Monday, September 26, 2005

Des Walker for Tottenham Hotspur (vs Nottingham Forest), 18 May 1991

There I was, minding my own business as I drove home from work, when I was savagely cut up by one of those massive BMW X5s. The driver didn't pay me any attention when I waved my hands half-heartedly at him, and proceeded to weave his way on through the traffic at high speed.

The registration of the car? DES3.

Yup. I have just been cut up by Des Walker.

From my experience, this kind of behaviour is fairly common from X5 drivers. I can't comment on what kind of a driver Mr. Walker is when he is behind the wheel of DES1 (an Audi TT) or DES2 (a new Mini Cooper). What I can confidently say though, having seen him disappearing into the distance on a road already choked with traffic, is that you will never beat Des Walker in rush hour.

12 comments:

El Tel said...

Abel Xavier, A565 (northbound), just outside of the Albert Dock, Liverpool. About 2 years ago. Same thing. But he was in... a Smart car.

SwissToni said...

jesus - what do they give Djimi Traore as a company car?

Ben said...

They don't - he has to make do with a pair of rollerskates.

Lord Bargain said...

I'll post my David Platt road rage tale in due course, just for the gratification of the Forest fans amongst you.

Prick.

Charby said...

Wheee Look at me go!

I'm unstoppable and oh-so-modest with my football score predicting skills!

weenie said...

El Tel...you got cut up by a Smart car??? LOL!

Were you on foot? ;)

El Tel said...

Weenie, I was temporarily distracted by the hairdo of the not-very-smart Smart car driver. I faltered. He bobbed and weaved. It was a cut-up, but only on a technicality. But then again, I was driving the saloon equivalent of a tank.

SwissToni said...

cut up by King Neptune, the God of the Sea, as he drove a Smart Car. Nice.

Ben said...

I always thought he was the lion from 'The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe'...

Lord Bargain said...

who, El Tel?

SwissToni said...

but ben - if I am reading C.S.Lewis' not-very-subtle allegory correctly - that makes Abel Xavier Jesus, doesn't it?

I suppose at least it means we get to see him executed. Sadly it also means that it won't be the last time we enjoy his lumpen footballing skills.

ST

(and Lord B. do keep up!)

Baz said...

I was almost run over by Des when I still lived in Nottingham about fifteen years ago. It was a Jag, DES1 I think